The Decision

I had decided to try one more time to try to explain the whole idea of weight loss, calories, etc. to Mr. Darcy.  I sent a detailed email.  He responded that it made no sense to him, that everything he's ever read contradicts it, and that while he'd love to believe me that he does not and that without medical articles stating what I told him he will not believe me.  I am angry about that.  I sent him articles about it, but I've shown him things about this before too.

So I made a decision. I don't care what he thinks about this.  I'm angry about how he handled it, but I realize that I'm the one who eats (or fails to eat).  I'm the one who trains (or doesn't train).  I'm the one that this really matters to.

THE decision is that I am going to do exactly what I think is right.  I am going to eat healthy foods to get to my calorie requirements, and I'm going to eat those calories like I should.  I am going to talk to the endocrinologist about a nutritionist and all that.  I am going to focus not on the number on the scale but on body fat percentages (thanks Big Daddy Diesel - goal is 23% the lowest end of healthy, we'll see what happens, but with hard work and time I can do it).  I am going to do what is best for me.  I am the one it matters to most and I'm not going to worry anymore about what other people think.  I'm doing what I think is best for me.  In this case, it's eating healthy foods to get to the correct number of calories.

I didn't quite get to 1995 calories yesterday.  But I was so much closer than I've come in a long, long time.  I made it to 1615. Today's goal is 1965.

What. a. difference.  This morning I tore up the pool like it was no body's business.  2300m in 47:07 minutes.  I didn't get to the full 2500m because well, I was late.  Yup.  Alarm clock failed to go off, which translated to my arrival at the pool at 7:40 am.  But, I was happy with my swim and hop the 200m I shaved off will get made up another day.  Even yesterday with a serious lack of sleep, I had energy like I haven't had in weeks.  Of course, the lack of sleep caught up to me about 7 pm, but I made it through.

Came home and had 2 eggs, 1/4 c. of low fat shredded cheddar, 2 slices of small slice whole grain bread, a v-8 and a cup of milk.  I was one happy lady.  And now for work, lunch with a friend, fun with the kiddies tonight, sending out the valentines cards for the family, getting stuff for the girls' classroom Valentine's parties, doing the valentines, buying little valentine's goodies for the girls, and cleaning up the house for my parents' visit this weekend (not to mention wrapping Dad's birthday present). (If you even wonder whether I use my blog as a to do list... the answer is pretty much yes...)